I Get Exhausted Talking To People, Why?

Do you have the feeling that you are not able to be in meetings because talking to people exhausts you? Do you think that socializing is a waste of time and it is difficult for you to relate to others? If the answer is yes, this article is for you because we will explain why we feel exhausted when talking to other people.

First of all, it must be clear that when a person feels uncomfortable talking to people, they do not always have a problem. That is, there are personality traits that are characterized by less “stamina” when it comes to relating to others and interacting socially, and this does not imply that there is a hidden psychological problem. There are also difficulties such as fear of public speaking that can be confused with being exhausted when interacting with others, but that do not really have anything in common.

However, there are psychological disorders that cause great difficulty in opening up and talking to other people. For example, those who suffer from depression or anxiety tend to suffer from this type of situation, since they focus their attention excessively towards themselves and therefore, they are not in tune with other people.

Reasons why you get tired when talking to people

Next, we will explain some of the main reasons why you can experience that feeling of fatigue, tiredness or exhaustion when talking to others.

Specific personality traits

There are different types of personality and depending on the author we refer to, we will find different classifications and categorizations of it.  However, virtually all personality models have a trait known as introversion. This trait is not something that you have or do not have 100%, it is not about whether it is present or absent, but rather that we all have it to a greater or lesser extent.

Introversion is a widely recognized personality trait. It is the tendency of the individual to live in his inner world and to be comfortable and happy in situations in which there are few people or he is allowed to be at his own pace and express his emotions when he feels like it, without pressure.

The opposite trait or pole of introversion is extraversion. However, it is important to remember that we all have these traits to a greater or lesser extent, so even if we are very sociable, we may have days when we do not feel like talking to people and we even get tired of paying attention during conversations.

In fact, for the brain of an introvert, talking to people represents a significant expenditure of energy and therefore they tend to run out. It’s not that your brain has a hard time talking to people, but rather that other activities such as creativity, introspection, reflection, and analysis are prioritized over socializing.

For this reason, it is recommended that introverts spend time alone and intersperse it with outings, keeping in mind that there is nothing wrong with feeling this way.

Low mood or demotivation

Low mood or lack of motivation make people feel that everything costs them a lot, it makes a world for them to relate to others, work or perform daily routine tasks.

In this sense, if your mood and level of personal motivation are low, it is normal that talking to people exhausts you. The reason is that being trapped in these states, you feel that others do not contribute anything, do not motivate you and also take part of your time. 

It is true that one way to improve how we feel at the moment is to talk to people, but for this strategy to work you have to choose very well with whom to do it. Above all, it is important to avoid those who only transmit their problems and complaints to us, since in this way instead of feeling listened to, we will experience a great burden when holding their negative emotions.

Another reason why it can be exhausting to talk to people, and that is related to your low mood, may be the insecurity experienced by not knowing who to talk to about what is happening to you. On the other hand, it is important to mention that low mood also coexists with difficulties in maintaining attention and actively participating in social situations. Therefore, how you feel emotionally affects your ability to talk to people and relate. 

Finally, if talking to people exhausts you, you have to keep in mind that even if it tires you a lot, it is a necessary activity, because we are social animals and isolation only leads to greater isolation.

A possible alternative to improve your situation may be to better select who you talk to and on what topics. Since it can happen that being an introvert you interact with very extroverted people and that they “demand” a great social participation when perhaps, it does not motivate you.